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笑話集 |
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笑話天地
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錯誤
一對夫婦結婚二十周年，老婆提議殺隻雞慶賀一番。
老公冷冷應道：「何必把二十年前的錯誤算在一隻雞頭上呢？」
Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles
and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or
troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.
男職員向女主管請假......
男職員：「經理，我想請假去向我女友求婚。」
女主管：「（鄙視）難道你沒有聽過婚姻是愛情的墳墓？」
男職員想了一想....。
男職員：「那我把事假改成喪假。」
Wife : You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at
your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife : You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem
can there be greater than this one?"
Wife : Honey..... What are You Looking for ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing...?? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an
hour??
Husband : I was just looking for the expiration date.
Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.
有一次,有一個人的老婆被一隻驢子踢死了
在葬禮上,有許多男人來祭拜,
有一個路過的人問說:這個女人一定很漂亮,要不然怎麼會有這麼多的人來祭拜,
一個人回答說:
他們是要來買這隻驢子的....
And, finally...
After a high speed chase, the police finally stopped the man behind the wheel.
Amazed by how far this man had run, the police said to him "today is your lucky day. give me a good excuse and I won't give you the ticket."
"My wife left me with a cop," without hesitate, the man told the police "when I saw you coming, I suppose you are bringing her back"
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